00:00:08
Just pulled out four eyelashes. That can't be good
00:00:11
Just breathe. That's it
00:00:13
Just try to think of nice calm things
00:00:16
Raindrops on roses and whiskers on kittens
Doorbells and sleighbells and something with mittens
00:00:25
Something with string
00:00:28
I'm all better now
00:00:34
Come on. You can't live on your parents your whole life.
I know that. That's why i was geting married.
00:00:40
Give her a break. It's hard to be on your own for the first time.
Thank you
00:00:44
You're welcome. I Remember when i firts came to this city.
00:00:47
I was 14. My mom had just killed herself
and my stepdad was back in prison.
00:00:51
I got here and I didn't know anybody and I end up living with this
albino guy, who was cleaning winshields outside of Port Authority, and the he killed himself
00:01:01
And then i foud aromatherapy. So believe me, i know exactly how you feel.
00:01:08
I cant believe what i'm hearing here
00:01:15
Would you stop?
Was i doing it again? YES!
00:01:22
How does she do that?
I cannot sleep in a public place.
00:01:28
Would you look at her? She's so peaceful..
00:01:35
Central Perk is proud to present the music of Miss Phoebe Buffay
00:01:46
Hi. I wanna start with a song about that's about that moment when you suddenly
realize what life is really all about. Ok, here we go.
00:01:59
Ok.Thank you very much
00:02:03
Phoebe, you're on. Oh good!
00:02:06
Hi. Ladies and gentlemen, back by popular demand, Miss Phoebe Buffay
00:02:16
Hi. Thanks. I wanna start with a song that means
a lot to me this time of the year
00:02:28
I made a man with eyes of coal and a smile so bewitchin'. How
was I supposed to know that my mom was dead in the kitchen?
00:02:48
My mother's ashes, even her eyelashes, are resting in a little yellow jar.
00:03:03
It doesn't matter. I just don't wanna be one of those guys that's
in his offices until 12 o'clock at night worrying about the WENUS.
00:03:12
The WENUS?
Weekly Estimated Net Usage System. It's a processing term.
00:03:22
So what you're gonna do?
00:03:23
I don't know, that's the thing. I don't know what
i wanna do. I just know i'm not figuring out working there.
00:03:27
Oh! I have something you can do! I have this new massage client, Steve
00:03:34
Anyway, he's opening a restaurant and he's looking for a head chef.
00:03:44
Hey, No yeah you're a chef, i know, and i thought of you
first but Chandler is the one who needs a job right now so..
00:03:54
I just don't have a lot of chefing experience unless it's an all-toast restaurant
00:04:02
What kind of food is he looking for?
00:04:04
He wants to do something ecletic so he's looking for someone who
can create the entire menu. Oh my god! Yeah, i know! So, what do you think ?
00:04:14
Thanks Pheebs. I just don't really see myself on a big white hat.
00:04:20
Oh Monica! Guess what?
00:04:23
Hey Monica what you gonna make?
I dont know.. It just gotta be so great!
00:04:28
Oh! I know what you could make! I know You should make that thing..with
the stuff.. that thing with.. with the stuff.. ok, I don't know
00:04:42
Marcel? Oh my god! Something just brushed against my right leg!
What is it?! Oh, it's ok. It's just my left leg..
00:04:56
Phoebe what do you think a good stage name for me would be?
Flame boy!
00:05:06
Ok Monica you kinda losing it here! This is
really becomig like a weird obession thing!
00:05:11
This is madness! It's madness I tell you! For the
love of god Monica! Don't do it! Thank you..
00:05:22
They're tinny and chubby and so sweat to touch
00:05:26
Soon they'll grow up and resent you so much
00:05:31
Now they're yelling at you and you don't know why,
and you cry, and you cry, and you cry
00:05:40
And you cry, and you cry.. Thanks Ross! I'm paying you to stop!
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